My Personal Story of Gratitude

One evening, I found myself sitting on the sofa with my mom, having another one of our cancer “hash it out sessions.” It never fails; whenever I visit, we spend some time reviewing new details, sharing funny stories, or discussing unanswered cancer-related questions. It may seem morbid on the outside, but our cancer talks are cathartic and have helped us process all that we have endured over the last five years. My cancer diagnosis has been unique, and navigating it as a young woman with my mom, who is both a cancer patient and a nurse, has been unusual. Yet, it's a testament to our resilience and strength.

My mom's duel role

It's both a blessing and a curse that my mom knows both sides of the cancer world. She could interpret what the doctors were saying, knew the realities of what I'd be facing, and had to become my interpreter and navigator. Navigating my cancer diagnosis with my mom meant forgoing the typical mother/daughter relationship for a few months and replacing it with a nurse-patient dynamic.

Challenges in my bladder cancer recovery

My recovery was tough, with several setbacks that prevented me from being independent at home. Unfortunately, my husband needed to continue to work full time and could not stay with me 24/7, so eventually, we made a difficult decision. I temporarily moved back to my hometown with my mom, who became my home health nurse. She managed my medications, monitored my hydration levels, helped me battle malnutrition, and acted as a physical therapist to help me regain my ability to walk more than ten steps at a time.

It wasn't easy. As I’m sure most know, mothers and daughters are prone to fussing at each other, which increased significantly when she was in "nurse" mode. I was angry, frustrated, and exhausted, and we often butted heads. My mom experienced the same emotions; she was watching her little girl struggle to turn a corner and be able to move forward. It was a constant battle for her to balance her roles as a mother and a nurse. For nearly three months, I lived in the bedroom next to hers, and her support finally allowed me to get well. The best recovery gift was the day I packed my bag and moved back home, finally able to care for myself and be independent. More importantly, I could return to enjoying my mom being my mom rather than my nurse.

Gratitude for my mother’s support and guidance

Five years later I still call her from time to time and ask her to “put her nurse hat” back on. From her own experience with cancer, she is uniquely able to understand my stress, worry, and venting sessions. I always look forward to our “hash it out sessions” that always seamlessly transition to funny stories and talking about normal life.

I am so thankful that my mom has been such an integral part of my cancer journey. She has been my rock of support and education, which has allowed me to advocate for myself in a way many cancer patients won't have the opportunity to. So this is me publicly saying "THANK YOU, MOM!" You are my superhero nurse, and I'm so thankful for you.