@rottenhawg although my procedure was a little different, I can help answer some of these. You will need to take it easy at least 6-8 weeks post-op to allow the healing to take place. That's standard. If you have any complications or other health issues, it may take a bit longer. When you do get the "okay" from your surgeon to start doing things, START SLOWLY! Remember you just had major surgery and it takes time to get back to all the things you used to do.
Sex and intimacy are still on the table. You may have some physical hurdles to work through, but there are physical therapies that can be done to help those along and you may just have to take longer to warm up to things.
What else ya' got? :)
Although I hope some of these answers help ease your mind, I don't think the anxiety and dread will subside until after the surgery. I know mine didn't. I think it's just part of the process...unfortunately!