My Bladder Cancer Story
I don't know why I have been so hesitant to share my story with people, but I think this is a safe place to let it out...I am a typical woman, mom, and hard worker. I have always been relatively healthy. Active, eat healthy most the time. But like most busy moms I had signs and symptoms that I ignored because busy with life.
The symptoms I was having at first seemed like normal 38 yr old woman stuff. Leaking, urgency, sneeze ya pee a little, jump rope ya pee a little. I have had 4 children and I thought that stuff was normal. Then came the always fighting UTI's that wouldn't go away. Antibiotics wasn't fixing it. So tired all the time.
Then the pain with urination and back pain. Also I started to feel pressure down low. And some blood in my urine, color change, very concentrated urine. The pressure felt kinda like a contraction. And bladder spasms. I got scared and finally went to the ER.
The next thing I knew I was in surgery
Well, they did blood work and a scan and found a large mass in my bladder. The ER dr. told me I have bladder cancer, just blurted it out, in a way that made me feel like I did this to myself.
My guy and I just held each other and cried. I was shocked and dumbfounded. He referred me to a urologist. The urologist looked with the scope and definitely saw a large mass.
The next thing I knew I was in surgery to remove the mass. The results from pathology was definitely cancer. My urologist said I have T1 bladder cancer. And it was in the first layers of my bladder.
About a month later had another surgery to get some more growths removed. ER visit 10-27-17, first surgery 11-7-17, second surgery 12-7-17. I started my BCG treatments in February of this year. I finished my last one the 23rd of February. I'm so scared that it's going to get into my bladder muscle, but I'm trying to stay positive. I know it's been like 4 months but I'm still in shock I think.
Feeling like bladder cancer is my fault
The anxiety is the worst for me, my mind constantly is racing, and every little pain makes me so nervous! I know I'm not alone and that helps. I have my check in with the scope the 27th of this month to see if I have more tumors or not. And I guess we'll go from there. Probably another round of BCG treatments.
I know I'm early in my journey and I'm sure my feelings are normal and I'm not alone. I didn't even look up any info on my diagnosis until after my 2nd surgery.
I found BladderCancer.net and I am so grateful that this exists. I have a very small support system. My guy of 17 years (he has been so strong for me, but I can feel he's scared and hurting but doesn't want to let me see it) and my son who's 12. A few coworkers, and BladderCancer.net!
For some reason I don't understand I feel like I'm responsible for this.....like I have just rocked my family's world and it's my fault. Anybody else feel this way? Whew ok, that wasn't so bad. Thank you for listening and being my support BladderCancer.net!!!
What is your bladder cancer story?
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