Unexpected Surgery

By CommunityMember533

1 min read

It was your typical morning, planning on going to church to conduct a funeral. I went into our bathroom to take a leak and looked down; I was urinating nothing but blood. My wife and I went directly to the hospital, and by the end of the day, I was told I had a huge mass in my bladder.

I was scheduled the next day for exploratory surgery. They could not remove all of the mass, so I was put on a schedule for chemotherapy. After 5 months of massive chemo treatment, I was scheduled for an 8-hour surgery. They removed all of the bladder, prostate, and many lymph nodes. I woke up a different man.

Nothing works for the erection problem, and this has been 3 years of searching. I have tried everything but no erection! Life has changed, but I have a very loving wife who helps me survive. I wake up every morning with my wonderful wife, but I still hate my bag. It is a constant reminder that I am a ssurvivor of bladder cancer! I just miss my old self!

This is my story.

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Laura MacKenzie Member
<inline-mention username="CommunityMember533" user-id="4509515"/> Hi. Firstly thank you so much for bravely telling your story. I had my bladder removed 4 years ago. I have two bags.For a very long time, I too found it very much a reminder, daily, of the cancer. It does get easier. I have only found that really in the last 9-12 months. It has had implications for me too in the bedroom and I know how hard that can be. I too have a supportive spouse, my husband and we have found other ways to be intimate. Most days still I am grateful for my bags which saved my life but there are still other days when I feel they have robbed me off so much. It’s ok to have the bad days too, I have learnt that. It’s ok to not always be grateful. These days are few now but I allow myself the time to feel like that and then move on when I am ready. Wishing you well. Greetings and positive vibes from Scotland. Laura, Moderator, <a href='https://BladdsrCancer.net' target='_blank' rel='noopener noreferrer ugc'>BladdsrCancer.net</a>
Dan Franke Member
CommunityMember533. I get where your coming from brother. Dual cancer survivor. Bladder and Prostate) My man stuff was lost in 2008. My beautiful wife and I still mess around and are able to show our love to each other. Just different these days. Helps we are getting older and she jokingly told me once it wasn't that special anyways.. Ouch!
1. Linda Urbanski Member
 @CommunityMember533 - Thank you for sharing your personal story. Many of us are blindsided with a cancer diagnosis and certainly the surgery and recovery is not easy. None of us woke up one day and asked for any of this yet we get through it and accept our new life because we are still here. Though things have changed, you are still the person you were before just not able to do everything as before. That is a challenge to deal with at times bur we do get through that eventually also. I thank you for sharing your story and hope that others may chime in with suggestions for you. My best Linda Urbanski ( moderator, <a href='https://bladdercancer.net' target='_blank'>Bladdercancer.net</a> team member)