Need Help

Hi. I am a caregiver, or significant other, to a man named Ricky who was diagnosed about 6 weeks ago. His symptoms started about June 2024. He went to his primary care dr who did blood test and urinalysis. It showed nothing. This was in August. He said to see a urologist but he had to have a referral. Finally a month later we got the referral. On November 8 he went to the ER because of pain and he couldn't urinate. After a CT and labs he was told they think he has bladder cancer, to see a urologist in the next 24 hours. They also tried to put a catheter in but couldn't get it in. So they gave him morphine and sent him home. The next day we searched for a urologist, the one on the referral did not have availability for 3 months and we couldn't wait. Then we found Dr Dafashy. He saw him by Nov 12. He looked at the CT from the ER and said he had a very large mass. He needed to do a cystoscope right away. Thanks to very high deductibles on his insurance we had to come up with the $500 for the scope. He couldn't get it until December 5. The mass was so large, we couldn't see his bladder wall. So next step is surgery to remove the tumor. That was on Dec 9. The mass was so large, all on the right side. It had grown over the ureter, disconnecting from the tube and kidney. Dr found it and put in a stent and reconnected to the bladder. He was sent home with a Foley cath for 7 days. Those 7 days were excruciating. He got an infection and ran a high fever but was called in Cipro, which knocked the fever out in 2 days, but the entire time he could feel the stent and it caused him pain. Dec 16 it was removed, thank goodness! That was yesterday. Since then he has passed what looks like chunks when he urinates and, now, again, he has no control and his stream spews in 4 or 5 different directions. He is really struggling with all this. Does anyone have any advice for me to be able to help him better? Oh also his feet look like balloons. They have for days now. We get pathology results on Friday and I am terrified for him. Please advise. Sorry for such a long post.