Radical Cystectomy (RC) for a Grandma?

Hi, my Mom has been diagnosed with Stage 4 Urethra cancer. We can't find much on that because it is so rare so we are cruising through bladder cancer forums for information. She has had chemo, radiation, brachytherapy, and now immunotherapy. There has been no spread except from the urethra to the bladder, but doctors consider it all the primary tumor. No lymph node involvement. Recent MRI and CT Scans show the tumor is shrinking and no new tumor activity. However, they still want to do a major surgery called an anterior exenteration (although when doctor describes it, it sounds like a radical cystectomy, where they will remove her bladder, uterus, and a portion of her vagina and reconstruct the vagina and create a urostomy. She currently has bilateral nephrostomy (urine drains from her kidneys to external bags) tubes but is having increased infections so they don't want that to be a permanent solution.

Anyway, she is going to be 80 in October and is worried about recovery from such a major operation. She is a very young 80...exercises almost every day, is out and about trapping/neutering/releasing cats (yes....a cat lady, haha), socializes with friends, family, etc. She is a busy bee.

She would love to hear stories of other older ladies who have been through something similar. Does anyone here fit that description? Or, even you younger gals, if you have advice, we would welcome it!

Thank you,

Sandra